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Amused Muse

Inspiring dissent and debate and the love of dissonance

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Location: Surreality, Have Fun Will Travel, Past Midnight before a Workday

Master's Degree holder, telecommuting from the hot tub, proud Darwinian Dawkobot, and pirate librarian belly-dancer bohemian secret agent scribe on a mission to rescue bloggers from the wholesome clutches of the pious backstabbing girl fridays of the world.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

And Now For Something Completely the Same

Well, you knew that Fred Phelps was going to protest at Heath Ledger's funeral, didn't you?

Honestly, this nation needs billboards that say, "Phelps. A National Turd."

Creationist morons want the military to spend more on parapsychology and remote viewing.

Remote viewing could just as easily be called “enhanced instincts and intuition” or maybe “unconventional internal perception.” Remote viewing is the ability to use and improve the “sixth sense” that most or all people reportedly have to some degree.
Remote viewing has reportedly been used successfully in many intelligence and reconnaissance efforts but its use has been limited.
The official remote viewing program was variously under the control of the CIA, Army Intelligence and Security Command, the Defense Intelligence Agency (DIA) and the Air Force in the ‘70s, 80s and early 90s. Project STARGATE was only the last of a series of code names for an effort also known as SCANNATE, GONDOLAWISH, GRILLFLAME, CENTERLANE and SUNSTREAK.
Remote viewing is a skill that seems impossible, beyond belief. [Um, yeeeaaaahh! Excuse me, you're a grown man?] However, remote viewing experts say years of research and practical application of remote viewing in real-life operational settings have proven that it works and works well. That which is not known can become known.

Oh, quite. By all means, let's throw our tax dollars in the toilet because all of the "evidence" for parapsychology isn't "in yet." We can think of no less than an infinite number of crackpot ideas for which the "evidence isn't in yet."

How about some billboards that say, "Fairies. Given them a chance." Well, frankly I wouldn't put anything past Clear Channel. Well, hell, I'll just grab a Tarot deck and nail a Pentagon contract! WTF?

But naturally when it comes to how evolution shaped the eye (over 40 times independently in nature), or homologues we've found in the genes that constructed the bacterial flagellum, or digestion in cows, suddenly "what is not known" can never become known. We'll never be able to answer it, so obviously, the answer is - Goddidit! No "molecules" to milk, people.

Well, that's news to farmers everywhere. (It's not a widely-known fact that rural farmers, at least in Minnesota, have less of a problem with the theory of evolution than do suburban dwellers for whom milk only comes from the grocery store.)

Oh, and abortion may cause cancer in rats. Stunning news, no? Proves that abortion causes breast cancer? Not really. You see, rats don't have breasts. The thing is, it's true that scientists can be wrong - especially isolated, politicized, conspiracy theory spouting Lone Rangers with an agenda.

Business as usual, folks. Which means, ironically, we're winning. :-) (Photo: Ray Comfort in “The Way of the Master” before he lost his own banana argument.)

UPDATED: Um, Ray Comfort invited atheists to his party at his blog, so I went, but my question about why other Christians have accused him of "false teaching" hasn't appeared yet. Oh, well. People shouldn't have accused me of "worshipping Satan." Moi?

In other exciting developments, Kucinich is nicer than Hillary. Blaaaaaah. I also predict that Tuesday will follow Monday. What are the chances?

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whereever Phelps and company show up, they should only be tarred, feathered, and ridden out of town on rails(split fence rails with the sharp sides up). What disgusting toads they are!!!

January 24, 2008 2:00 PM  
Blogger Kristine said...

You said it! Their whole lives revolve around other people being gay. Gayness is all they talk about, eat, breathe, drink, and shit. It's beyond disgusting, it's indescribably putrid and psychotic.

January 24, 2008 2:40 PM  
Anonymous Janine said...


The Phelps clan depend on people physically attacking them. They then sue the attackers and get more money to for their traveling funds. They been doing that for decades, back when most (straight) people did not care because at that time, they only targeted gay men.

My tactics for dealing with the "Fags Burn In Hell" when they would show up at GLBT events was to smile and wave at them. I will not give them the abuse they so clearly want. This was even about the death threat call to a lesbian group I was a part of.

January 26, 2008 1:13 PM  
Blogger Mister DNA said...

The best way to deal with the Phelps family is the same way a Pennsylvania town dealt with Klan rallies. Unfortunately, I haven't seen it put into practice yet.

Here's the plan: when the Phelps clan comes to your town, organize a counter-protest where local businesses donate money to groups like GLAAD, PFLAG and veteran's groups. For each counter-protester in attendance, the businesses give a small amount to these groups.

In other Heath Ledger news, Big Pharma is responsible!

January 26, 2008 6:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tarrin' 'n' featherin' is really too good for Phelps 'n' company. What I really want done is their drawin' 'n' quarterin' with heads left on spikes at the city gates. Unfortunately, I am not authorized to effect such punishment. Accordin' to the fed'ral Constitution, Eighth Amendment, no one in the United States of America has the authority to utilise such deadly force. I'm of the opinion that the punishment should fit the crime. The Phelpsian hatred of abberant sexual orientation, based on an outmoded ancient text, the Holey Babble, just gripes me, body, mind, and soul.

January 27, 2008 9:22 PM  
Anonymous Janine said...


I am not saying I would get upset if any of these things happened to the Phelps clan, would not bother me in the least. But I am not a murderer and I trust you are not one neither. And I am not a cheerleader for murderers and these people most certainly are. I claim the moral high ground over these scum. But that is not saying much. And I refuse to give them the abuse they expect from people like me. It feeds into there world view.

But it is nice to see straight people get upset at them. For many years, it was primarily GLBT people who dealt with them.

January 28, 2008 2:00 AM  
Blogger Kristine said...

Well, I just want to remove all the kids from that family. It just makes me sick, the poison being taught them. I don't understand 1) someone being anti-gay, and 2) that person basing his whole life on it! I wonder what's really going on in that family, but I'm not sure I want to know. Smoke of another fire, there.

January 28, 2008 11:04 AM  
Anonymous Janine said...

A few years ago, an investigative reporter did an in depth story on Fred Phelps. And yes, the abuses that his children went through were as bad as you think. Here is a link. Best to have a strong stomach.

January 28, 2008 4:06 PM  
Anonymous Janine said...

Let me try again.

January 28, 2008 4:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Phelpsians (I spit and curse at the mention of the name:P-tah!!!) hold that homosexuals burn in hell. My question is how the hell can they go to hell when there sure as hell no such place as hell.
Matthew Shepherd had more to offer as a useful, productive citizen than did the two drop-out lowlifes that murdered him. They should be on Death Row; they should die wanting to scream, but unable to because of the dirty socks they ought to be gagged with. If there is divine justice, there is an uncomfortable, unpleasant corner of purgatory waiting for them.

I do not perceive myself as a murderer, but there are those people so worthless that they should be eliminated quickly with no delay.

January 28, 2008 8:18 PM  
Blogger Kristine said...

I hope you're quoting from Henry VI, Scotius.

Janine, the first link worked. Holy crap, these people are worse than I thought! But about the teachers back in 1972 who saw what was happening? Where was their responsibility? Of course I remember that in the 1970s child abuse was still not talked about.

Another lawyer. At least Phelps was disbarred. This whole thing sounds like the House of Usher.

January 28, 2008 9:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am not familiar with Shakespeare's "Henry VI." Just which line am I supposed to be quoting?
Actually, I am paraphrasing the opinion of Lazarus Long, as stated in "The Tale of the Adopted Daughter" in "Time Enough for Love," by Robert A. Heinlein. He knew what should be done with gangster types, and given the proper conditions, he did it (or rather, he will have done it since the story is set a thousand years in the future).

January 28, 2008 11:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Phelps(Curse and Spit: P-tah!!!) gang got nowhere near the private services for Mr. Ledger. I am grateful for that. The only place they(Curse and Spit; P-tah!!!) should get close is a superheated corner of perdition.

January 30, 2008 10:41 PM  
Blogger Kristine said...

The line is, "First thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

Did you see this latest insanity, via Pharyngula?

I think it's a flipping threat. I think Dawkins should press charges.

January 31, 2008 1:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I had heard the line, "Let's kill all the lawyers," but I didn't know its source.

January 31, 2008 2:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tomorrow is Sausage Day.
You know.
Ground Hog Day.

February 01, 2008 1:42 PM  
Anonymous JanieBelle said...

I can't find it now, but I saw a picture of someone at an anti-Phelps protest holding up a sign that said "Every time you see a rainbow, God is having gay sex".

Put me in stitches.

It was from another Phelps shindig, not from when he was here a few weeks ago.

February 09, 2008 12:44 PM  

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