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Amused Muse

Inspiring dissent and debate and the love of dissonance

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Location: Surreality, Have Fun Will Travel, Past Midnight before a Workday

Master's Degree holder, telecommuting from the hot tub, proud Darwinian Dawkobot, and pirate librarian belly-dancer bohemian secret agent scribe on a mission to rescue bloggers from the wholesome clutches of the pious backstabbing girl fridays of the world.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Ask Questions! Ask Questions! And then...

Glenn Beck is going to tell you exactly how to think for yourself, and then he's going to tell you exactly what to do with your new independence!

Okay, Preacher Glenn, I'll ask a fucking question: where the hell is the letter 'C'? 'C,' you know, as in conspiracy?

This is beyond hilarious, and beyond pathetic. "I don't know if we're going to turn into an oligarchy or what we're going to turn into, but unless you ask questions, we're going to turn into something." Yeah, no shit.

Later on (in the longer version of the video) he says he's tired of being a vitim! Bwahaha. Was the set rew smothering their giggles, or were they (more likely) hyponotized like bunnies by the harisma given off by this guru, who looks like he's trying to strangle the air with his hands? (Something he obviously learned from Dick heney.)

Faux News: They report, you de_ide!

These worthless fucks get paid for this rap!

(P.S. That should be "hoking"!)

Oh, and don't forget to head on over to Pharyngula for your Friday ephalopod. They've got mother-effing ephalopods, man!

UPDATED: Oh, oh, oh! Glenn Be_k says that I am on fire! My goodness, we liberal bloggers "can just stick around, because I think you can help America learn some more things." Oh, yeah, baby. There are lots of things to learn, Glenn. Spelling is just the beginning.

"You can't have an oligarchy without the czars!" Yeah, and you can't be a communist, either.

And you couldn't talk about Americorp Brown Shirts, Obama concentration camps, and whether Barack Hussein Obama was circumcized, now could you? (Okay, can you right-wing nuts decide whether or not it is patriotic to be circumcized? Because apparently Limbaugh thinks it's another fascist takeover.)

Dumb fuck.Anagrams for "oligarchy":
cigar holy
larch yogi
a richly go
a lyric hog
archly go I
hag cry oil
gaol cry hi
ha coy girl
rah icy log
ya rich log

SECOND UPDATE: Glenn Beck, modern day Savonarola.

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Thursday, August 20, 2009

"Death Panel" Twit Yells "Heil Hitler!" at Israeli Jew

This is the depths to which the health care "discussion" by the right-wing has sunk. Unbelievable.

What a disgrace! Then this ding-dong tries to justify herself:

Yeah. After fake crying and yelling "Heil Hitler!" at the Jewish guy who paid $8000 for two hours in the emergency room, she whines about her uninsured husband having three jobs.
If there are legitimate concerns regarding health care reform, why are people stooping to this level?

And by the way, if "nobody is obligated to give you health care," then what are Sarah Palin et al talking about in the first place? Their "death panel" fearmongering is obviously based on the assumption that doctors are obligated to give everyone health care, or they wouldn't be invoking the spectre of revoked care, now would they?

If "nobody is obligated to give you health care," unless you're one of the insured, or you're rich, how is that any different from the Nazis? How is that not "Darwinian," another scare-tactic from the right?

UPDATED: Her name is Pam Pilger.

She tweets as "Disernment" [sic]. Yeah, English only, toots. Great spelling.

It looks like she's made the news in Israel.

Oh, and now the weirdos are claiming that this was faked by Democrats. Uh-huh. Pam Pilger is a Democratic plant? Show me the evidence.

(All the protesters are "plants" now, it seems. I guess the whole tea-bagging snore-fest was orchestrated by Democrats, too? Oh sure, and we selected Sarah Palin for John McCain. Didn't you know that? Maybe George W. Bush was a plant by us? You can't handle the truth!) Give me a break. If Pilger is a Democratic plant, then Obama is a Republican plant!

But, of course, you can't trust me, for I'm part of the "Obama Youth" Brown Shirts, because I'm--I'm--I'm helping an Americorps volunteer teach recent immigrants and elderly people how to use the computer! I've been indoctrinated, just like Michelle Bachmann's son! And you know what that means - next stop, we'll be joining the Manson family next!

Sad. Sad, sad, sad.

Republicans were for end-of-life counseling before they were against it

The GOP has become a party of nihilists.

(I hope all these people in the photo don't mind being defamed as "Democratic plants" by their fellow conservative Republicans.)

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Monday, August 17, 2009

No Pubic Socialism!

Hahaha! This pretty much sums up them durn teabaggers/Nobamas, don't it?

No pubic option? What are we going to have then, blondie - a pubic requirement?

One is tempted to say, "Get a brain, morans!"

You anti-health care, "death panel" people are killing me! Oh - sorry.

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Thursday, August 13, 2009

Sour Grapes, Again

Josh Rosenau has an excellent dissection (if you'll pardon me) of teh Ben Stein affair. But I can't let this go:

Everyone used to love my column until Expelled, and then people were mean on the internet and got me fired from a job I didn't want anyway [emphasis mine].

Point 1: Stein, not "everyone" loved your column. Felix Salmon didn't. And I certainly did not, though half the time I didn't know what the hell you were talking about! (Hence my reference to "glossolalia.")

Point 2: You "didn't want it anyway"? Isn't that what you said about your upcoming (but not anymore) commencement speech at Vermont? Man, I totally call phony-baloney on this. Have you ever been disinvited/fired from something that you did want?

Ben Stein, actor - in a one-man stand-up routine of Aesop's Fables. Too bad that, alone there on the world's stage, he's the straight man in a larger cosmic joke, mostly on him. But hey, if there's a buffoon, there must be a buffoonator. Right?

UPDATED: The Wall Street Journal blog sums up, and gives information on how to receive your truly free credit report.

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

UPDATED: Advertisers are fleeing Glenn Beck's clown routine. I guess when they say "Kill Grandma"* they didn't realize it was being used like "kill the people," i.e. make them laugh.

Did you know that even a great scientist like Stephen Hawking would not stand a chance in the British health care system?

Stephen Hawking: a Briton. And not dead. But probably dying of laughter - if this crap were funny.
The most boring person in the world (sounding more slurred than usual here) just lost his gig at the New York Times. And all because he advertised a scam which offered a free credit report that wasn't.

He claims that it was because... because... because atheists wrote hate mail to the Times!

The sad thing is, no we didn't. At least, I didn't. I had forgotten all about Ben Stein. And his train-wreck of a column.

(It's not hard to do, frankly.)

I'm in Texas attending a conference and eating food that I haven't been able to get my grubby hands on since 2006, when I visited Georgia. (Blackened catfish! Country fried steak! No, I won't touch it in the north!) I have too much to do these days to write any more than the one letter I fired off to the Times asking when they were going to tire of the snake-handling. Felix Salmon dropped his "Ben Stein Watch" and I did not pick it up. Ho-hum. But if Stein wants to claim that "the atheists" somehow created this pre-existing policy at the Times about conflict of interest, that's fine. I'm flattered. We all should be. (It take more evidence to believe that the Times already had this policy, than to believe that we went back and changed the past to put it there! Uh-huh. Maybe we planted all those fossils, too? Of course!)

Then he said it was because he starred in Expelled. Yeah, right. That was only over a year ago. (I guess you lose track of time when you, uh, have the ability to transcend it. Gee, if only we could go back in our time machine and change the past again so that Ben Stein was never bor - I am a genius!)

I guess all the financial blogs have been take over by teh atheists, because they're pretty much nodding
in approval
at his firing.

(Also here. And here. Boy, I need a drink after going back in time and writing all these posts! *Twinkle*)

Compared to the liability for intelligent design that Stein has proved himself to be (I'm beginning to feel sorry for the Disco Boys), he's making atheists sound like they have supernatural powers. That's not the way to convince the American public to buy into supernaturalism. They might start thinking that naturalism is, well, super. It sure beats being a crybaby.

One more thing: "Americans in Financial Hole." Why did that just give me the creeps?
*Note how the "Kill Grandma" right wing clown routine is begetting an unholy "survival of the fittest" phenomenon. Ironic, huh? (Not really.) You see, it's okay when creationists do it.

Oh, by the way, Stephen Hawking is still alive. And still British.

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Friday, August 07, 2009

The Shimmying Cowboy

And, ladies and gents, to continue our celebration of Revisionist History Month, did you also know that cowboys of the old west were individually tutored by older cowboys in dance and choreography?

Next up: Stamp collecting intelligent design advocates - finally out of the closet!

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