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Amused Muse

Inspiring dissent and debate and the love of dissonance

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Master's Degree holder, telecommuting from the hot tub, proud Darwinian Dawkobot, and pirate librarian belly-dancer bohemian secret agent scribe on a mission to rescue bloggers from the wholesome clutches of the pious backstabbing girl fridays of the world.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Pants on Fire!

Get ready for the cryfest. Ted Haggard has finally confessed to having a sexual attraction to another human being. Or as he puts it, to being "guilty of sexual immorality, and I take responsibility for the entire problem. I am a deceiver and a liar. There is a part of my life that is so repulsive and dark that I’ve been warring against it all of my adult life."

Is that all? Damn. I thought that he was going to confess that paying a prostitute for sex maintains an unfair power differential. Or that he was a shameless homophobe. Or that he was wrong about the age of the earth, and should not have baited Richard Dawkins. Or that he thought his grandchildren were going to laugh at him someday.


Blogger JanieBelle said...

Yeah, he fessed up to the wrong thing. His problem isn't that he's attracted to men, his problem is that he's cheating on his wife, lying to his sheep... I mean followers..., causing unnecessary pain to undeserving people, spreading hate, fighting to repress the rights of other people, etc. etc. etc.

He still owes a lot of people a proper apology, to put it mildly.

Hypocrite. Liar. Crook. Cheat. General all-around scumbag.

November 05, 2006 5:03 PM  
Anonymous deadman_932 said...

The part that got me recently was him stopping in his car to discuss harsh questions from a reporter...while his kids were in the damn car.
Otherwise, I hope he can deal with being a gay or bisexual male and not hurt others around him more by continuing his charade. Maybe some good can come of this.
Speaking of doing good...Vote on Tuesday!!

November 05, 2006 5:13 PM  
Blogger Kristine said...

Right on, JanieBelle. What repulses me is that people like him are repulsed at having a human emotion toward another person regardless of physical gender. Well, so much for the "soul," Ted. Yeah, scumbag is right.

(The Biblical scholar in me is tap-tapping at my window: "Don't the Gospels say something about 'Prostitutes shall be first in the Kingdom of Heaven'?")

Deadman, I didn't see that, but that is truly deranged. I wonder if he yelled at Dawkins (on Root of All Evil?) with his kids in the car, too? Sick. He needs to apologize to his kids. He needs to apologize for the right things to a lot of people, including Dawkins. (I'm a little protective of Dawkins, aren't I? I'm trying to earn a certain nickname.)

And no fear, even before I could vote I was telling my parents how they should. I admit I'm helpless before my politics addiction. I've voted in every election--I think that I may have missed one primary! :)

November 05, 2006 9:12 PM  
Blogger The Science Pundit said...

I was waiting for him to confess to being a talking booger. ;-)

November 05, 2006 9:43 PM  
Anonymous deadman_932 said...

I think you might be remembering Matthew 21:31 -- "Jesus saith unto them, 'Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you.'" When he was upbraiding people about not believing John the Baptist. That's right after the withering of the poor little innocent fig tree.

November 05, 2006 10:04 PM  
Blogger Kristine said...

Oh, deadman, I forgot about the poor little fig tree. I think that I've repressed a lot of the Bible.

I was waiting for him to confess to being a talking booger.

Yeah. I did say that, didn't I? (A testable hypothesis?) Well, yes, IT WOULD BE A START!

November 05, 2006 10:33 PM  
Blogger bigdumbchimp said...

How long until he announces he's going into rehab for being an alcoholic?

November 06, 2006 6:39 AM  
Blogger JanieBelle said...

It's sadly telling that he should rather be seen as a drug addict and an alchoholic than as a man who has sex with men.

Talk about messed up priorities.

November 06, 2006 7:10 AM  
Blogger PiGuy said...

I was thinking the same thing, Rev. First: "I take full responsibility."
Second: "I have an alcohol/drug problem."
Third (any minute now): "I was abused by my minister(father/a family friend/insert name of trusted adult) as a child."

So you're gay, dude. At least now that you know maybe you can start showing some love to somebody. Who cares if it's another man.

How about coming clean with your wife and kids and the rest of that pack of ninnies that you call a congregation and use your powers for good? Nah. They all think that god hates gays already. That's the only reason that you spouted that shit in the first place.

Get help, Ted. Get help.

November 06, 2006 7:59 AM  
Blogger Kristine said...

Whether alcoholic or not, or sexually abused or not, the next message is sure to be (just like Foley and Gibson and Swaggert, ad nauseum) “It’s all about me! I’m the biggest sinner in the world! Now, everyone watch me blubber.” Know what, Ted, I think there are more important things going on in the world right now than your “sin.”

You know what, Ted? The earth is billions of years old. There ain’t nothing out that that it ain’t already seen. Get me?

November 06, 2006 9:42 AM  

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