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Amused Muse

Inspiring dissent and debate and the love of dissonance

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Location: Surreality, Have Fun Will Travel, Past Midnight before a Workday

Master's Degree holder, telecommuting from the hot tub, proud Darwinian Dawkobot, and pirate librarian belly-dancer bohemian secret agent scribe on a mission to rescue bloggers from the wholesome clutches of the pious backstabbing girl fridays of the world.



Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Heh. I Just Coined A Term



Go to the Sandwalk for details. Regular UD commenter Mats shows up!

Also see this discussion, which followed from this one in which Answers in Genesis fans complain that scientists are defining science as science, and won't let creationists publish biblical allusions in science journals. Therefore, scientists are elitist meanies.

Not-crime!

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Monday, June 25, 2007

"Doood! Evolution is, like, sooooo bogus!"

Dude, so like, a buncha hipsters totally went to the gangsta Creation "Museum." Fubar. Fubar. Don't even!

My man Wesley, my man Jason, my man Professor Steve Steve, and teh hawt science chica Dr. Tara had a really great time. NOT!

Something that Tara mentions reminds me of that hideous "Shreck" thingie that John and I went to at Universal Studios:

We were told by the employees that it was a satirical look at evolution. All I have to say is, if they think that was satire, they really need to read some Twain or Swift.

The premise was that the angels Michael and Gabriel were talking to a lost and wandering camper--a frustrated soul who was looking for meaning in the world, but didn't want people to "think she's stupid" by believing that science was wrong about evolution. The whole movie, while slick, was like an extended Chick tract (Big Daddy comes to mind, as part of it consisted of "Mike" and "Gabe" harassing a science teacher...."duuuuude, like, evolution is sooooo bogus").

And special effects were out in full force. The chairs vibrated with thunder, or when the angels "whooshed" away, and the chair backs squirted water during the rainstorm. (This was SUPREMELY annoying).

Yes, it is. It also creeps me totally out because it reminds me of those "feelies" in Brave New World.

My brother noted that these distractions occurred frequently when they made a really astounding claim that might make a person think--"let's distract them by spraying water in their face!" An interesting theory...

This theme presented itself throughout the museum. I guess my one main surprise was that despite hailing themselves as an alternative science museum, there really was fairly little science there. Sure, there were videos to watch and many of the exhibits had narration, but just based on the displays, they really half-assed (hell, more like quarter-assed) the "scientific objections to an old universe and evolution" part of the "museum." Instead, the focus was more typically on "why Christianity is good for you" and "why human reason is wrong".

As if! Look, I don't know how to say this nicely - but this shit it not about science at all. It never has been. It's about making people as boring as possible.

(What if you started talking about a particularly exciting football game and I cut you off with, "Do you actually think that those two teams are creating the game through their meaningless struggle, like two amphibians on a beach? Don't you know that IT IS JESUS WHO PLAYS THE GAME? The players aren't sufficient in themselves to make football happen! There has to be a Master Player controlling everything! You tell me who won, and I'll tell you that that's just how God plays with Himself." Would that make me sound like a person interested in sports, and curious at all about the rules, plays, players, and strategies? Well, that's how I feel when people tell me, "You tell me how life evolved, and I'll just say that's how Goddidit." Gee, thanks for your sermon. Now I'll just go find some people to talk to who are curious about what I'm curious about. Bye.)

What this doggerel is about is a running grist mill of mediocrity - making everyone into everyone else. No sparkle, no disobedience, no real curiosity - all reactions, no deep thoughts (though plenty of cherry-picking, emotional arguments, appeals to authority, and other such logical fallacies). I get tired of the Hitler allusions to the right wing but I must tell you, the photos of this sideshow's "exhibits" reminds me of those putrid art exhibitions of banal paintings that Hitler held. And the dire warnings of evilutionism's "corruption" - straight out of Goebbel's exhibition of "Degenerate Art."

And don't get me started on the megachurch - Nuremburg rallies parallels, because Richard Dawkins hit the nail on the head with that one.

Shimmies to Pharyngula, Aetiology, Panda's Thumb, EvolutionBlog, and the NCSE.

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Friday, May 25, 2007

Ken Ham's Petting Zoo Opens to Shut Minds

SECOND UPDATE: Greg in the comments asks what I'm afraid of.

I'm afraid of ending up like this. And praising God for it. Poor thing. He needs help!

I don't want to sound like a snob but I don't think these losers have anything to teach me - except how not to end up. And I'll betcha they're thrilled by the Creation Museum [sic]. Got it?

Be afraid; be very afraid.
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UPDATED: Boy oh boy, what a proud day today is for America! Ken Ham's Creation Museum opens on Memorial Day - the one day when we should not be engaging in deliberate collective denial about our past.


Even the fucking Iranians don't believe this shit!












Just unbelieveable.
























Ken Ham spent millions of dollars on this crap? It looks like Thomas Kincaid tried his hand at sculpture. The best part of it is Eve's hair. Yes, I'm sure that they had Breck Girls back then in the Middle East! (UPDATED: Notice that Adam and Eve are white. Still white. Well, at least they're not blonde. Sheesh.)
















Yeah, I know just how he feels.

NICE GOIN', AMERICA! Visit that huckster Ken Ham's Museum of Creationist Bullshit and make sure to BRING THE KIDS!


















It can be said that on this day the United States of America became a fourth-world nation. Be proud.
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Well, despite what that nefarious Ken Ham claims about the past, we definitely co-exist with dinosaurs today. That’s indisputable.

If you thought it appropriate in a John Waters fashion that a Liberty University student was arrested for schlepping bombs (and that’s bombs, not bongs) to Jerry Falwell’s funeral, ostensibly to let all God’s little tweety birds sing their eulogies in the place of Fred Phelps, who was protesting Falwell’s death (what does Phelps want, Falwell alive again?) , take a gander at the museum built by dinosaurs for dinosaurs.

It’s opening in Kentucky, mind you. Kentucky, where apparently they don't believe that Adam had a penis (this according to a reporter from Esquire who visited this pile of rubbish). This is the house that Ham built.

If you thought that the collapse of a fat-assed former calypso playboy in his office while he waited for the Rapture was the height in hilarity, remember these song lyrics:

My friend says we're like the dinosaurs
Only we are doing ourselves in
Much faster than they
Ever did
We'll make great pets!
We'll make great pets!
We'll make great pets!
We'll make great pets!

Lapdogs for Jesus! That’s what these people want to be. That’s what this “museum” is about –domestication. They don’t want scientists telling us that evolution reveals our nobel, wild, free past, because this 10,000 year-old experiment in our self-domestication will not be complete until we’ve done in the entire planet, too.

So sit up and beg, just like the poor, burdened dinosaurs at the Creation Museum in Kentucky – Kentucky, that bastion of science education. Put on your saddle and run around with your tongue hanging out. Maybe the Master will give you a bone, or maybe He’ll kick you, but never show disloyalty, because whatever it is, it's always your fault. Even if He's not there at all (in which case, tag after the biggest dog in the pet store).

And don’t run with the wolves!

Or read my short story based upon Ken Ham's Creation Museum.

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

Creation Museum Opening Draws Nigh

Shirkers of the world, unite! You have nothing to lose but your brains.

Ken Ham's Creation Museum is featured in Newsweek. Here it finally is, in all its asinine glory. And according to last year's Esquire article about this museum, Adam doesn't have his, er, T-Rex. Hardly Paradise, if you ask me.

America is becoming a dinosaur-pimped Russian Federation. Is Ken Ham our very own Lysenko? You decide! As for me, I need a drink.

I need a couple drinks. And a cigarette. And I don't even smoke. I can't believe people swallow this crap, in this day and age. In the richest, most prosperous country in the world. That has citizens like these*.

Yeah. I need to get hammered.
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*Well, I guess the video is no longer available. Too bad, because it was incredible. People on the street were asked to name a country with a name beginning with U. “Yugoslavia?” No, how about the United States of America? D’oh! (I confess that I thought of Uganda, Uruguay, and Uzbekistan, but not the U.S.A.) Then people got all excited about the prospect of invading Iraq – uh, they meant to say, invading Iran. (Iraq, Iran, same difference…right?) Then they put thumb tacks all over Australia, called it “France,” and said that we should invade that, too.

Let’s invade the world! D’oh!

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